BE WORRIED, FANBOYS.
Dark Mayhem: [leaning over the twitching mass o' fanboy] "Ne, was she trying to hit Havoc or Chaos?"
Chaos: [twitch twitch!] "J-Jo'o-sama...."
-only to have him Cream Lemon all over her living room.
Havoc: ^-^ "Hotcha! Bedlam, baby, it's Jello time!"
Chaos: --;; [buried upside-down in Cream Lemon] "This isn't funny Bedlam!"
Carnage: "For you maybe. Anyone else want some popcorn?"
Fanboys: ^-^ [all perfectly clean beneath their umbrellas] "Hai!'
Havoc: "Jello for everyone too!"
Fanboys: "SHADDUP HAVOC!!"
"Damnit!" Bedlam cried. "Why can't I smite him?"
Carnage: [with hanky] "I know, Bedlam, I know. I've asked that question so many many many many many many--"
Dark Mayhem: "Um, Carnage, we'd like to continue the fanficfic in the near future."
Carnage: "--many many times. JUST WHY CAN"T YOU STAY SMITED FOR ONCE?!?!"
Havoc: "Because panties are forever!!"
[Cue the facevaults!]
Pesti: "Carnage, why are you even trying to reason with him?"
Rampage, who had been nibbling on Chaos's shirt throughout this entire scene (He was male, ecchi!)
Fanboys: o.O "Ano...."
[They all slowly look at Chaos.]
Chaos: --;; "Oh, grow up! I am not a Starlight! You always call me a crossdressing transsexual wanna-be. "
Pesti: "Strange how he so vehemently defends that insult now."
Dark Mayhem: "Aside from the crossdressing part, I don't think there's a difference between the two insults at all."
suddenly ran around the room, gulping up the Cream Lemon. Finally, Rampage jumped into Bedlam's arms.
"Rampage! Bite her arm off or something!"
"CHU CHU!" said Rampage.
Chaos: [grrr!] "Rampage, cough up Mokona and do something useful for once!"
Rampage: ^-^ [mph!] "CHU CHU!"
Chaos: "Well if you won't help I'll find another mascot who will eat her!"
[Cue Inu Yasha racing across the fanficfic!]
Chaos: o.O "KYAAAAAA!!! That's not what I had in mind!"
Inu Yasha: "Bark Bark!"
Chaos: [frantic SD mode!] "I thought Kagome had you enrolled in Obedience School! Bad doggie demon!!"
"Aw...Rampage is so kawaii!" Bedlam exclaimed. "Rampage, can you go into my room and clean *that* up, too?"
"CHU CHU!" With that, Rampage ran upstairs, and was back in about ten seconds.
Rampage: ^-^ [purrs]
Anarchy: "Yes, my kawaii little Rampage-chan. You keep on slowly digesting Mokona until his puffy marshmellow insides dissolve."
Pesti: [turning to Anarchy] "Remind me not to explore your dark side."
Chaos: [trying to shake Inu Yasha off his leg] "Dammit, do I look like a mailman?!"
Inu Yasha: "Grrrrrrr!!!"
"Useful as well as kawaii," Bedlam noted. "Ah, well, time for you to leave!" she said, waving. "G'bye!"
And with that, the signal was given, and the four fanboys disappeared, and reappeared in their normal Anime dimension.
Chaos: ^-^ "I'm saved!"
Inu Yasha: [raising his hind leg] "Yip yip!"
Chaos: o.O "Hey! I am not a fire hydrant either! KYAAAA!!! He's peeing all over my Tamahome Hilfiger pants!"
Bedlam walked slowly up to her room, and nearly fell over in shock when she found that it was clean. She sat down on her bed, and noticed a mysterious envelope. She slowly opened it.
Pesti: [reading the letter] "'I know what you did last fanficfic.' Okay, who pissed off Naoko during the Yoikofic?"
[Cue Havoc & Aika girl chorus line!]
Havoc & the Aika girls: [singing] "Oh, the wonderful thing about Havoc is Havoc's a wonderful thing! His brain is made out of Jello, his ass is made out of spring!"
Carnage: [punting Havoc!] "I think we've had enough evidence, thank you very much!"
"YES!" she screamed suddenly. "I've been accepted to the School of Mass Destruction! I'm now *officially* Underlady in training, training, Bedlam! They think I have good smites!"
Chaos: "What is it with our series?! Do we just attract psychotic and deranged people?!"
Dark Mayhem: "You're one to talk."
Chaos: "If it wasn't for the fact that I'm wearing stockings, Mayhem, I'd drop a cow on you for that one."
She smiled. "Arigato gozaimusu, Lord Chaos-chan."
Chaos: o.O "Ano...."
Pesti: [ribbing Chaos] "Now who's cheating on Mako-chan?"
Chaos: "SHE IS NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!!!"
Haruka: [unsheathing her Space Sword] "And it had better stay that way."
Chaos: [sweatdrop! "My...the blade is so shiny I can see my Reflection...and I could really use a perm."
[Haruka promptly whacks Chaos upside the back of the head with the sword]
THE END...of the beginning.
Chaos: "In the beginning there was Anime, and it was good."
Havoc: "And then there was Doji, and it was nekkid!"
Chaos: "Quit interrupting my narration!!"
Pesti: "You mean you actually had a point to that line, Chaos?"
Chaos: [kawaii kitty ears!] "Maybe."
[Cue Inu Yasha!]
Inu Yasha: "Bark Bark Bark!"
[Abruptly Inu Yasha gets yanked onto the couch!]
Anarchy: [holding onto the dog demon's leash] "I tire of this running gag. Now be a good half-breed youma and fetch me more Sake!"
A NEW FANGIRL HAS APPEARED.
SHE WANTS TO SMITE YOU.
Pesti: [sweatdrop!] "Why would she want to do that?"
Dark Mayhem: "Maybe she finally cracked after what Havoc did to her on the last page."
Chaos: "And that was?"
Havoc: [boing boing boing!] "Panties! Panties for Hentenno-sama!"
Dark Mayhem: "Everything Havoc does on a normal day."
Chaos: [sweatdrop!] "......"
AND IT WILL HURT.
Pesti: "Just why is it that no author at all ever bothers to write something uplifting which involves us?"
Havoc: ^-^ "Hotcha! I've got Haruka's panties!"
Carnage: --;; "Do we count all that Havoc's been allowed to get away
Dark Mayhem: "And before you decide to 'uplift' Havoc, Carnage, might I remind you that our cleaning bill for this week is hitting six-digit figures courtesy of you."
Carnage: [sigh!] "Why are you guys complaining? We *all* roasted marshmellows over Tokyo's smouldering crater after I Satellite Strike'd City Hall."
Chaos: "Some of us were *in* that smouldering crater the entire time too, might I add!"
Carnage: "Yes, and your point is?"
Yes, 'tis I, the one who changes her name with every e-mail!
Dark Mayhem: "However, Cream Lemon tsunamis are unavoidable in every one."
Carnage: "MEGA BRAND!!"
Havoc: ^-^ "Oro?"
Pesti: o.O "TAKE COVER!!"
Chaos: --;; [covered in Cream Lemon] "Curse you, Bedlam."
This fic started when I decided my life was so strange, the only thing that could make it odder was if Havoc appeared!
Havoc: ^-^ "All hail the conquering pervert!"
Carnage: *ahem!* "Okay, now it's time to show Bedlam how to properly smite someone--namely Havoc. Cue my latest Escafanboy model!"
[Cue the towering form of Escafanboy!]
Pesti: o.O "Carnage! It's getting scuff marks all over the floor!"
Chaos: [looking up] "That looks like a giant armour plated Gumbi."
Carnage: [climbing into the cockpit] "I did some modifications and had Bardiel, the 13th angel worked into the skeletal frame. You know, the Angel who took over EVA 03 and gave it those kick-ass rubber arms that could stretch in any direction. Imagine the range I could get with that wielding the twin-bladed scythe!"
[Escafanboy abruptly powers up, a low growl escaping its head.]
Carnage: "Now then, Bedlam, we could start at step 1: Step On Havoc. But we're immediately going into the advanced levels. We're going to pirouette left and then cleave him in half with the scythe blades. After that...."
Havoc: ^-^ "Oro?"
[Suddenly Escafanboy screeches and goes berserk!]
Carnage: o.O "KYAAAA!! The Angel's corrupted my hydraulic system!"
Pesti: [sweatdrop!] "Is Escafanboy supposed to do that with its legs?"
Chaos: "Sugoi! I never knew mechas were also body contortionists!"
Carnage: "THEY'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE!!"
Fanboys: [wince!] "Ew!"
Pesti: "Aiya! Now *that* had to hurt."
Carnage: [teary Bambi eyes] "Escafanboy...."
Dark Mayhem: "Aw, what are you so upset about? Your ultimate mecha does this every few fanfics anyways."
Carnage: [sniffle!] "But it's like losing a family member. I feel like Duo Maxwell did when he saw his Deathscythe Gundam get wiped out as OZ target practice on national TV. Excuse me...I need a hanky."
Chaos: [blink blink!] "Oooookaaaay."
As any fan of the fics knows, when Havoc appears, the other Fanboys couldn't be far behind!
Somewhere along the line, I made this into a contest with myself
Chaos: "To see who could go the longest without being hentai?"
Pesti: "Ironically enough, Havoc beat us all at that game."
to see if it *was* possible to even write part of a Fanboys fic without numerous nekkid flashes, or even the Senshi at all...I succeeded, but it was pretty hard!
Havoc: "Don't fear the perv, Bedlam! And while we're at it, how about another rousing game of Spank the Senshi! You can have first dibs on the spoon this time!"
But he's dead that's all that matter! I Win!!!!
Havoc: [singing] "Oh, the wonderful thing about Havoc is Havoc's a wonderful thing!"
Mayhem: "I don't suppose she bothered to check Havoc's pulse after she kissed him, did she?"
Chaos: [looking at Havoc] "It's almost hypnotic watching him go...like that Cream Lemon lava lamp he has on the living room table."
Pesti: [sweatdrop!] "Baka."
I made this into a prologue to the fanficfic I'm slowly writing.
Dark Mayhem: [evil smile] "Let's write one about where Ami-chan and I get to [beep!] [beep!] [beep!] in the tub."
Carnage: "And just why the hell should any author--let alone Bedlam or our author--indulge you, uber exploding Newt-boy?"
Dark Mayhem: "How many times has our author let you blow up the city, Carnage?"
Carnage: [irate SD fanboy] "But it keeps coming back!!"
It shall be out! Sometime before the next millenium, even!
Dark Mayhem: --;; "Damn."
Pesti: "Well, at least you're in good company."
Chaos: "Who even said it was a self-gratuitous, non-combusting fanfic between him and Ami-chan?"
Havoc: ^-^ "Daojibu, Mayhem! A little romp with Arshes Nei in Planet Hentai's Jello wrestling pit will solve your problem!"
[Cue Red Queen Ami-chan!]
Red Queen Ami: [with whip!] "Carrot...!!!!"
Dark Mayhem: "I'd thank you Havoc, but I know that I'm just going to start another backdraft by the time she's done with me."
Chaos: [hmph!] "Well at least you've got someone like her, Mayhem. I've got a twelve year-old harbinger of doom running after me."
Pesti: "Some people would kill to be in your place, Chaos."
Chaos: [grrrr!] "I DO NOT HAVE A LOLITA COMPLEX!!!!"
Carnage: [teary Bambi eyes!] "Hotaru-samaaaa! Why him? Why?!"
On a completely unrelated note, did you know that the new Millenium actually starts in the year 2001?
G'bye for now!
Underlady in training (I'm Anarchy's underlady...
Pesti: "Oh, she's going to hang out with Anarchy."
Hysteria: "Three people on drunken karaoke?! Aiya!"
[Cue the Tokyo Tower that smites Hysteria for no apparent reason!]
Be afraid, Chaos. Be very afraid.) Bedlam.
Chaos: o.O "Wait a minute...she's Anarchy's protégé? KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Dark Mayhem: "Is he even breathing?"
Havoc: [already with Bedlam's panties] "Hm, Bedlam really does have SD Yuu panties after all. Cute."
Pesti: [groan!] "Yare yare."
Carnage: "Is the fanficfic over now?"
Dark Mayhem: "More or less. There's little else for us to rant about."
Carnage: "Good. Now I have an excuse to wantonly do this: DRAGU SLAVE!!!!"
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