Narrator: “And with the grace and flair of a one-legged swan trying to land, Chaos went flying straight into the giant red Torii at the entrance to the Fire River Temple.”

Chaos: “Itaaaaaiiiii!! But…at least this landing didn’t get any more painful.”

Narrator: “Suddenly the Torii went toppling forwards, crushing Chaos into the sidewalk.”

Chaos: --;; “I am starting to seriously loathe you right about now.”

Narrator: “Don’t blame me, blame Newton’s Law of Gravity.”

Chaos: “Ha! Chaos don’t play that game, narrator-boy. You and I both know that nobody in Anime obeys the laws of physics. And where am I now, anyways?”

Narrator: “Well, if a certain avatar had been listening to my exposition at the start of this scene….”

Chaos: “Well, if my ears hadn’t been shoved through that stupid Torii at the front gate…! Wait…that means I’m at the Fire River Temple! Ha! Divine inspiration! The author obviously meant for me to come here and find something for Hotaru…but what?”

Narrator: “Sitting atop the crumbling ruins of the Torii, Chaos ruminated about his current situation.”

Chaos: “Okay, if I am meant to be here, then obviously that smite was an altruistic one. And if that smite was an altruistic one, then obviously I am on my way to receiving one of the good endings for this fic! And if I am on my way to receiving one of the good endings, then that means my legs are indeed sexier than Derwin Mac’s! And if my legs are sexier than Derwin Mac’s, then no one can stop me! And if no one can stop me, then I was meant to be here! And if I was meant to be here, then obviously that smite was an altruistic—“

Narrator: “Okay, that’s it. I’m interjecting here. You know, Chaos, if it’s guidance you seek, why not find Rei? She’s the miko at this temple after all.”

Chaos: o.O;; “Why…that’s brilliant! It’s so simple, even Crayon Shin-chan could understand it. Of course…he’d wave his ‘elephant’ at it too.”

Narrator: “Moving right along, should Chaos look for Rei in: A) in the courtyard; B) her bedroom, or; C) the sacred fire chamber?”

          A) COURTYARD
          B) BEDROOM
          C) SACRED FIRE