> Months and months walked by,
Chaos: ^-^ "It's a parade!"
Fanboys: [singing] "The months go walking one by one, hurrah! Hurrah!"
Dark Mayhem: "Unfortunately the pair of walking months were hit by a car while jogging one morning."
>and I never dare to say anything
Pesti: "Everyone just thought he was mute."
Carnage: "I could rip out his tongue if you want."
Dark Mayhem: [looking at Carnage] "Rei and Miyu may tear your clothes off, but they're just not giving it up, are they?"
>about having... sex with me,
Dark Mayhem: "I hate... useless pauses."
Chaos: "Shatner really gets around, doesn't he?"
>I respected her I didn't want to hurt her by any reason
Dark Mayhem: "This lemon's a good reason for her to hurt him though."
Chaos: "How do you hurt someone with an 'any reason'?"
Pesti: "We just show that you didn't have 'any reason' for writing that Gaoguyver Chaosfic of yours, and their brain will hurt."
>because she was the person I have loved the most.
Carnage: "Meanwhile this was the fic we have loathed the most."
> We used to expend our afternoons together,
Chaos: "Ah, those expendable afternoons must be wearing the red security uniforms from Star Trek."
Dark Mayhem: "That, or they were extras cast in a Paul Verhoeven film."
Carnage: "Or drafted as Leo pilots in any given Gundam Wing episode."
Pesti: [as Johnny Expendable] "Wait a minute...I'm in a disposable Gundam. What the hell am I doing in a disposable Gundam?!"
>just feeling how love was running thru our veins
Havoc: ^^ "That's not love running thru my--!"
Carnage: [dropping a VOTOM on Havoc] "I don't recall giving the pervert gallery an excuse to speak."
Dark Mayhem: [covered in whipped cream] "I guess Havoc was right; his blood is pure Cream Lemon."
Pesti: [grumbling with the WetVac] "What do you expect? The guy's liquid hentai!"
>and how that made us happy.
Havoc: "Happiness is a bowl of Jello in one hand, a pair of panties in the other, and a naughty tentacle working it's way up your--"
Fanboys: "SHADDUP HAVOC!!"
Havoc: "What? Just ask Polaris."
Riot: --;; [somewhere outside the theater] "Most dishonourable."
> One afternoon in the summer she asked me to go to her home
>the next day, in the night
Chaos: "Oooh! He's dressing up as the full moon!"
Dark Mayhem: "Does that mean he'll be charged with indecent exposure?"
Pesti: "If that was the case, he'd have been arrested shortly after presenting us with the disclaimer."
>(I just knew she wanted something now),
Carnage: [as Hotaru] "You are a virgin, right? I can't make my sacrifice to Pharaoh 90 if otherwise."
>the sunlight fading in the horizon reflected on her face
Pesti: "What is she? A rearview mirror?"
Chaos: "Gives all new meaning to 'blinded by her radiance'."
Dark Mayhem: "With any luck, no one will be able to read their lines and the fic will have to be cancelled."
>and made it look like another sun for me,
Fanboys: [singing] "Mister Sun, Sun, Mister Golden Sun! Come on and shine on down on me!"
Carnage: "Good. We can die from skin cancer before this fic continues."
Pesti: "Won't that be kinda painful?"
Carnage: "Compared to reading this lemon? Not a chance."
>the one that could illuminate me forever.
Pesti: "Hey, look! If you shine a flashlight through his ear, the beam of light really does go through the open space in his head!"
> Her violet eyes were beautiful, and they catch my attention
Chaos: "Much like a misplaced zip-up of the pants."
Havoc: "We've got a bleeder!"
Dark Mayhem: "If the evil glare doesn't work, she'll have to resort to a restraining order."
>as I heard her sweet voice asking me to be with her the next
Pesti: [as Fuller] "Come on, Hotaru. You know we're both in this lemon for the same reason."
Havoc: [as Hotaru] "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"
Chaos & Carnage: o.O "WHAT?!"
Dark Mayhem: "Hotaru's been taking her cues from Haruka-poppa and Michiru-momma, it would appear. Chaos, you lucky guy; you qualify for both genders!"
Chaos: --;; "Shut up about that."
> That night seemed to be endless for me,
Chaos: o.O "You mean this fic never ends?!"
Pesti: "Calm down, Chaos."
Dark Mayhem: "Maybe this is like Setsuna's 1000 nights of pleasure with Mamoru."
Havoc: "But for Hentenno, it was the End of Summer! Satomi, let's get nekkid!"
[Cue the Endless Waltz!]
Satomi: [being dipped by Havoc] "Do you mind?"
>I just could not think in anything else
Chaos: "So he wears a tutu to his exams?"
Pesti: "That's *you*, Chaos."
Chaos: [indignant] "Can I help it if chiffon is my colour?"
Havoc: ^-^ "I think best when I'm nekkid!"
Fanboys: o.O [slowly turning to Havoc] "......"
Dark Mayhem: "Havoc, put your damn clothes back on!"
Havoc: [grumpily putting his DOJI BOY sweater on] "You know you're squashing my muse."
Carnage: "That's not all I'll be squashing in a minute, you perverted twerp."
>than Hotaru's beautiful face, her slim and soft body, her smooth
Dark Mayhem: "What is she? A bar of soap?"
Chaos: "Hotaru Tomoe: 99 and 44/100ths% pure...at least before this fic."
Havoc: "She goes on smooth, without leaving any flaky white stuff!"
Carnage: [punting Havoc] "You're the only one who leaves that kind of residue around here, you freak!"
>and her arms and lips as she hugged and kissed me good bye that
Pesti: "She just wanted one last, good look at him before he got creamed in a tragic--and utterly coincidental--hit and run involving Eudial's maniacal driving."
> I really loved her.
Chaos: --;; "I really loathed him."
Pesti: "Awwww, jealous?"
Chaos: "Do I look like someone who describes my girlfriend as a lathering agent?"
Dark Mayhem: "Besides, Hotaru enjoys leather when around you."
Chaos: [eyebrow twitch!] "Was I asking for your opinion?!"
> My life without her was completely pointless,
Dark Mayhem: "Funny. This fic without her would be completely pointless too."
Carnage: [sulking] "This fic even WITH her is completely pointless."
Pesti: "I'd argue it was pointless to begin with."
Chaos: "Point taken."
>without her smiles and her giggles anything would be the same...
Havoc: "Yet with her bra and with her panties, so grows Hentenno's fame."
Pesti: [sweatdrop!] "You just have a perverted rhyme for everything, don't you?"
Carnage: "So Hentenno wants to be a star...how about a shooting star? MEGA BRAND!!!"
> Next night I went over her place,
Dark Mayhem: "It's so hard to get two people to fit under a rock, so they really didn't have any other choice but her place."
>and when I entered into her room I found something I had always
>wanted to see...
Chaos: ^^ "Fabio!"
Pesti: " The plot?"
Dark Mayhem: [as Fuller] "So that's what a woman looks like! You mean I've been buying the wrong blow-up dolls all this time?"
Havoc: [eyeball roll!] "Virgins."
> Hotaru was on her queen size bed,
Havoc: ^-^ "Next up, the Red Queen-sized bed! Spank me!"
>naked, pretending to be asleep under the silken white sheets of
Chaos: [as Hotaru] "Closer...closer...don't let on to him about the icepick in my hands...."
Dark Mayhem: [as Peter Venkman] "I like her because she sleeps above her covers...four feet above her covers. She barks, she drools, she claws, she howls."
Pesti: "Oh, she saw how much she was getting paid for this turkey?"
>Over her night drawer was a little sign she just made up with
Chaos: "'This fic was printed on recycled paper.'"
Dark Mayhem: "'I just feel safe to warn you I'm not wearing anything underneath.'"
Havoc: ^-^ "What a coincidence! Neither am I!"
>"Try to wake me up".
Dark Mayhem: "I guess he's never heard of the idiom 'let sleeping harbingers of world destruction lie'."
Pesti: "Try giving her your pure heart...oh, wait. This is a lemon, right? Never mind!"
> My eyes grew bigger as I came closer to her,
Dark Mayhem: "Might as well be his eyes. Nothing else on Fuller is going to get any bigger."
Chaos: [as Wayne] "Extreme close-up! Whoaaaaaa!!"
Chaos: x.x "I hate IMAX fics."
>I whispered into her ear "come on, my love",
Havoc: [singing] "Come on, Eileen!"
Carnage: "For the last time, Havoc, those lyrics do *not* mean what you think they mean!"
>I said, but she only moved her head into other direction
Pesti: "Who's this Other Direction guy, and why is she moving into him?"
Carnage: [banging his head against the seat in front of him] "Oh, great. Now we've got Ryoga Hibiki in a crossover cameo."
Dark Mayhem: [shrug!] "Or else it's Desolation."
Desolation: [between Gaghiel's jaws, holding them apart] "NO IT ISN'T!!"
Dark Mayhem: [gasping as Hotaru] "Oh no! You're not Motoki!"
Havoc: "He ain't Mokkori either."
Chaos: "At least it's not Mokona."
Pesti: [smacking Chaos with a cabbage] "Thanks for putting *that* unnecessarily vivid image into my head."
> "What do you wanna me to do, honey?", I asked
Dark Mayhem: o.O "Momma mia!"
Carnage: [as Hotaru] "I wanna you to shut up! And stoppa calling me 'honey'!"
Havoc: "Calla me the Queen!"
Pesti: >.< "These mock-Italian accents are almost as bad as the hentaific."
>but she didn't say anything.
Chaos: [as Hotaru] "Okay, I'll talk! I'll talk! I did it, ya see. I tried to end the world. And I'm glad, I tells ya. Glad! Glad!"
Carnage: "How does one pantomime wanting to crush someone beneath a mobile suit?"
Dark Mayhem: "Why would you go through the bother of pantomiming?"
Carnage: [pulling on a pan-dimensional rope] "Good point."
[Cue the Super Gundam Crushing Press squashing Chaos!]
Chaos: [twitch twitch!] "So that's what my pancreas looks like."
> "Do you wanna me to sleep with you?"
Pesti: [as Hotaru] "Only if you'll stop with that damned accent."
Chaos: "Maybe he's a collector for the mob."
Dark Mayhem: "Chaos, you dolt. The Japanese mob's called the yakuza."
Chaos: ^-^ "Gezundheit!"
Carnage: --;; "Baka."
>She only gasped softly.
Havoc: [as Hotaru gasping softly] "I can't believe it's not Hentai...Spray!"
Fanboys: [stomping on Havoc] "SHADDUP, HAVOC!!"
> "I think you mean yes, right?"
Chaos: "I demand a second opinion!"
Dark Mayhem: "Okay, you can't write fics either."
Chaos: [???] "What was so bad about Tekkaman Blade Runner?"
Carnage: "Other than the riot at SVAM to see who could riff it to death first?"
>I took off
Pesti: "At a high rate of speed."
Dark Mayhem: "So what are you still doing here?"
Pesti: --; "Damn! This fic's stuck in neutral!"
>my shoes, my shirt, my pants, my socks, my boxers.
Carnage: [looking darkly at the floor] "My lunch."
Dark Mayhem: [pointing at the fic] "His fault."
Chaos: o.O "My pantyhose!"
Havoc: ^-^ "Hotcha!"
Pesti: "He brought his boxers? Won't Tyson bite Hotaru's ear off during foreplay?"
Dark Mayhem: "Nope. Lucky for Hotaru but unlucky for Fuller, all those boxers turned out to be yaoi bishounen!"
Carnage: --;; "What's with all the damned yaoi jokes in this MSTfic?"
>Then I slid with her in the bed.
Pesti: "I've always wanted a Slip N' Slide in my bed too."
Havoc: "I can arrange that."
Pesti: "I was being sarcastic, you perverted twit!"
Chaos: [as Hotaru] "Why are you so shiny, Fuller?"
Dark Mayhem: [as Burt Reynolds] "It's Vaseline. I can feel it squishing between my toes."
> She was warm,
Dark Mayhem: "The plot was frigid."
Pesti: "And Carnage was in denial."
Carnage: [closing his eyes] "Maybe if I Giga Slave it, the fic will just go away...."
>and I could feel her smooth skin as I went closer to hug her
Chaos: "We've secretly replaced Hotaru with a 20ft. alligator. Let's see if he notices the difference."
> I started to kiss her face, neck and shoulders,
Dark Mayhem: "That's what he thinks!"
Carnage: "Turn her around, stupid."
Havoc: [argh!] "Virgins!"
>slowly, she moved back and just gasped again.
> "What this about?"
Dark Mayhem: o.O "He walked in on Hotaru and Shampoo's tryst!"
Havoc: [grrrrrr!] "Fuller's betrayed Rule 3! HIRYU--!"
[The other fanboys tackle Havoc!]
Fanboys: "NO CARNIVOROUS BRAS IN THE THEATRE, HAVOC!!!"
>I though as I went this time closer to her.
Pesti: [as Sylvester] "I though I thaw a Thailor Thenthi!"
Havoc: "Funny. I was looking at her puddy twa--"
Carnage: "RA TILT!!!"
Havoc: ^^ "Oro?"
>I hugged her body,
Fanboys: [singing] "Oh, you huggable you!"
Dark Mayhem: "This bed is getting pretty crowded; we've got Fuller, Hotaru, Shampoo, Ryoga, and some yaoi boxing guys."
Carnage: "Don't forget the alligator."
Pesti: "Well it's still not 18+ people, so they should shut the story down."
>this time strongly because I didn't wanted to lost my beloved
Carnage: [NASTY eyebrow twitch!] "That's not all he's lost."
Pesti: [sweatdrop] "'Didn't wanted to'? And what tense is that?"
Dark Mayhem: "Other than stating the obvious 'wrong tense'?"
Chaos: "Come on, pick a language and use it!"