Senshi Chaos Returns!
NEOHARUKA'S FANFICFIC, PART 2!!!
Carnage: "So, we survived two portions of the Crazed killer who still knows what we did last fanfic: once in Famine's slasherfic and then again in F6!"
Chaos: "Carnage, what are you talking about? You weren't getting chased by the crazed killer in Famine's Slasherfic!"
Mayhem: "Hai hai. Who would have ever believed it was Naoko Takeuchi?"
Pesti: "Well, it does make sense if she's destroying the hell out of really bad fanfics of her own creations."
Chaos: [grumble!] "I just don't see why she had to come after us!"
Hotaru: [grabbing hold of Chaos' arm] "Ah, Chaos-chan, you're here!"
Ami: [wrapping her hands around Mayhem] "Ne, Carrot-chan, do you want to skip out of this fanficfic for a few paragraphs and...."
[Ami-chan finishes whispering the sentence into a balloon-eyed Mayhem's ear. Spontaneous combustion ensues.]
Carnage: [arms crossed over his chest] "Well, there's two *damned* good reasons right there."
Havoc: "Hotcha! Look at this: panties from all the babes of Sakura Taisen! And Sakura's are silken kimono ones too!"
Chaos: "HENTAI!! LIKE I WANT IRIS CHATEAU-BRIANDE AND HER FREAKY
PSYCHIC TEDDY BEAR SHOWING UP HERE!!!"
[Chaos boots Havoc out of the fanficfic!]
Pesti: [sweatdrop!] "Add a third one to your list Carnage."
Carnage: [cracking his knuckles] "Actually, I'd rather delete that last one altogether."
Mayhem, Pesti, Havoc & Chaos: "'Actually, I'd rather delete that last one'."
Carnage: "Not 'all together' you morons! Summon: Gundam X!!"
[Carnage pulls out the perfectly intact Gundam X mecha from his pocket. Unfortunately the same cannot be said for the ceiling...or whatever's left of it.]
Pesti: [sigh!] "I'll fetch the spackle."
Mayhem: "Carnage, would it just kill you to simply refrain from using the oversized mecha indoors? Put on a hardsuit or something."
Carnage: "You're just jealous, Mayhem."
Mayhem: "Of what? Thanks to you no one's going to see a paycheck for these fanfics ever again. Without a recovery spell until the next fic, your Satellite Strike flambéd most of Tokyo."
Carnage: [Bambi eyes!] "Hai, and what a lovely mass destruction it was."
Pesti: "Ne, anyone see where Chaos disappeared to?"
[The fanboys glance down as this unimpressed li'l SD hand sticking out from under the boot of the X Gundam impatiently taps the floor.]
Carnage: [musing] "Hmm, I could have sworn I flattened all of him."
Hotaru: [wide-eyed] "Ano, is Chaos-chan going to be alright?"
Mayhem: "Aw, he's used to this, Hotaru-chan. Just give him an air pump and he'll be fine in a few minutes."
Chaos: [from beneath the mecha] "Hush, Newt-boy! Just cue the next part of NeoHaruka's fanficfic, okay?"
[Senshi Chaos] Konnichi wa! Welcome to the second installment of my Fanboys! fanficfic!
[Sailor Psyco] Umm...Chaos, don't you think we've made the readers suffer enough?
Chaos: [pumping his 2-D self back into 3-D SD] "Well you didn't exactly impress me by that intro we did for your fanficfic."
[Chaos is smited by a VOTOM that crashes through the ceiling for no apparent reason!]
Carnage: "I do my own impressions, thank you very much."
Hotaru: [dark glare at Carnage] "I'm warning you, Akito...!"
Carnage: [teary Bambi eyes!] "Why Chaos, Hotaru-sama? Why him?!"
Pesti: [sigh!] "It'll be a while before he gets adjusted to our author's sadistic tendencies."
Mayhem: "You notice how the names have been changed? It's no longer Senshi Psycho, but Sailor Psyco. Wonder why that is."
Anarchy: "According to NeoHaruka's latest missive, anyone as deranged as her could spell her name any way she wanted."
Pesti: "Hai hai."
[Senshi Chaos] What?! Of course not! If they can stand the regular Fanboy fics, than this is nothing!
[Sailor Psyco] YaddaYadda is NOT going to be happy!
Chaos: "You keep that parrot-thingy for a mascot away from me, you Chaos wanna-be!!"
Chaos: "Same to you, YaddaYadda! I've got a superdeformed carnivorous Godzilla-thingy and I know how to use her!"
Rampage: ^-^ "CHU CHU!"
Chaos: "KYAAAAAA!!!! GET IF OFF GET IF OFF GET IF OFF GET IF OFF!!!"
Carnage: [eyebrow raised in curiosity] "So...that's how he uses Rampage?"
Mayhem: "It keeps him in shape. All that super-deformed running does wonders for the heart rate."
[Cue the Fanficfic!]
Chapter 2: Getting to know you.
Chaos: [singing New York, New York] "Start spreading the news! I'm leaving today! I don't wanna have a part in this, NeoHaruka!"
Pesti: "Chaos, chill. Your petty rivalry with virtually every fanficfic author is not exactly helping out with the repairs to our apartment. At this rate I'll never see a paycheck for the rest of my life. Carnage isn't exactly helping either, I might add."
Chaos: "But I am the true Lord Chaos! There can be only one!"
Mayhem: "Do the rules say anything about trading characters with the title of Chaos?"
Carnage: "Hmm, you have a point Mayhem. This Senshi Chaos might make for a good fanboy Chaos instead."
As we last left the fanboys and their new umm... guests, they had just stopped a savage attack against Chaos and Senshi Chaos, the mascots having singled them out for *Special Treatment* Just as things had calmed down, Anarchy showed up. She was not happy.
Anarchy: [with sake!] "Oh come on! If there's karaoke and sake involved, everyone's happy!"
Pesti: [aside to Mayhem] "Only if they're too bombed to hear her and Tasuki sing."
Mayhem: [nod!] "Hai hai."
"What the hell is going on here?!" Anarchy walked into the Fanboys apartment. "Who are these girls and what are they doing to Rampage?"
Suddenly Sailor Psyco's eyes got huge and twinkly. "Is that...?!"
Mayhem: "Strange. Most people's eyes balloon out in terror upon seeing Anarchy."
Carnage: [kawaii bambi eyes!] "An-chan!"
Pesti: "We stress *most* people."
Hotaru: [giggle giggle!] "Chaos-chan, quit squirming!"
Chaos: "I'll stop if you only stop trying to sit in my lap! Haruka will seriously thrash me!"
Anarchy: "He says it like it's a bad thing."
"Anarchy." Confirmed Senshi Chaos.
Sailor Psyco wasted no time in bowing to Anarchy and grovelling, her eyes full of hero worship. "You are the greatest! Please, teach me, Oh wise and beautiful Lady of Destruction!"
[The Fanboys facevault!]
Chaos: [groan!] "Bad enough we've got Anarchy running amok in our fics, now she's got her own fan club joining her."
This of course had a very mollifying effect on Anarchy. "Hello there. I don't know you, but I can tell you have very good taste."
Anarchy: "Sake sake sake!"
Tasuki: "Hey, no fair! No chugging from the bottle!"
Fanboys: [sweatdrop] "......"
Senshi Chaos smacked her forehead. "I still don't get how my best friend can worship the Fangirl that lives to make my favorite Fanboy miserable!"
Chaos: "Ano...I'm her favourite?"
Mayhem: "Maybe that's why she took the title of Senshi Chaos. Congratulations, Chaos; you're the first one of us to get a dangerously obsessed fan!"
Chaos: [dunking Mayhem with a bucket of cold water] "Hush, Newt-boy!"
(VCR noises) Meeee Mee Mreeee Mee... (lets fast forward, to keep what's passing for a plot moving along.)
[Pesti-chan warily casts a glance at where the remote control of the gods should be.]
Pesti: "Um, guys...where's Havoc?"
Eventually, everyone was settled again, the others having explained the situation so far to Anarchy. She shook her head. "I really should take that Remote away from you guys. You obviously are not mature enough to handle it."
Anarchy: "Damn right! Tasuki, baby, grab that remote and click us into a really kick ass Anime bar! It's karaoke night at the Cat Cafe!"
Havoc: "Hai! We can have Jello and Piskus!"
Havoc: "What? What?! Pisckus is a fruit in Escaflowne! Ask Van Fanel! You coulda had it at Tempura No Escaflowne had Mister Smite-Happy not blown it up!"
Carnage: [eyebrow twitch!] "DIL BRAND!!!!"
Chaos leaned over and whispered to Pesti-chan. "Yea, well I would hate to see what happens if she and Tasuki get a hold of it during one of their drunken Karaoke sprees."
[Chaos is suddenly aware that everyone is on the other side of the room.]
Chaos: o.O "Ummm...shimatta!"
[Chaos is promptly blown through the ceiling by Anarchy's ATfield.] "I heard that."
Pesti: [looks up at Chaos legs dangling out of the ceiling] "Hai hai, Anarchy. And Chaos certainly felt it."
Carnage: "Care to run that whole 'don't punch holes in the ceiling' rant again, Mayhem?"
Mayhem: "Mecha punching holes in the ceiling is something we can stop. Chaos going through the ceiling however is fighting a losing battle against the forces of nature."
Senshi Chaos winced in sympathy.
"Sugoi!" Sailor Psycho breathed. "That was great!"
Anarchy: [pouring herself another cup of sake] "Wasn't it though?"
Pesti: [grappling onto one of Chaos' flailing legs] "Come on, Chaos. Hotaru's got the bandaids for you."
Hotaru: "Daijobu, Chaos-chan; I'll patch you up!"
Pesti: "Should Chaos consider himself lucky now?"
Mayhem: "Only if ignores that Space Sword behind him."
Anarchy grinned happily. "Finally someone who really appreciates how great I am!"
Carnage: [Bambi eyes!] "What about *me*, An-chan?"
Anarchy: [nonchalant] "You don't count."
[Carnage is beaned on the head by little falling SD Gundams, and the kana for "Cruel!!"]
"kyyaAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" Chaos's voice came faintly from the hole in the roof, getting rapidly louder as he fell through the same hole and resumed his original position on his chair.
Pesti-chan busied himself with dusting off his Overlord. "I am seriously thinking of asking Mayhem to become my new Overlord."
Pesti: "Well, I am an official lord of Mass Destruction now. After all I managed to summon that Rumblequake spell in F6!"
Chaos: [sulking] "Hmph! Don't let that smite go to your head, Pesti-chan! You're still just and underlord-in-training in my books."
Ami-chan: "He's taking it rather personal."
Mayhem: "He's just jealous because Lord Pesti-chan upstaged his cow smiting. By everyone else's standards, Chaos' smites of cows and umbrellas look rather lame now."
[Mayhem is clobbered with a falling cow!]
Anarchy then turned her attention on the newcomer. "So your name is Chaos too? I'm surprised that Lord Chaos is handling this so well! He really has trouble when he thinks people are trying to steal his title of mass destruction."
Chaos: "DAMN RIGHT!!"
Carnage: [smacks Chaos with the Zanba sword] "Must you always speak in Caps lock?"
Chaos sat up straighter, "YEA! What's with you trying to take my name?!"
"But I'm not Chaos, as in destruction. My title comes from the fact that I wield the power of Chaos, the evil power that had taken Sailor Galaxia over in SailorStars."
Chaos: [nervous laughter as he covers Hotaru's eyes!] "Um, pay no attention to that plot twist in the next season of Sailor Moon, Hotaru-chan!"
Anarchy: [sigh!] "Still an amateur, I see. I guess Senshi Chaos has still got a long way to go if she wants to be my rival."
Chaos: "The Chaos entity in Sailorstars *doesn't* have enough Mass Destructive power for you?!"
Anarchy: "Oh come on! I'd like to see that Chaos entity chug down six bottles of sake while dropping every last Angel on top of Tokyo-3 at the same time!"
Pesti: o.O "Ano...should I be getting my EVA now?"
"WHAT?" The fanboys suddenly decided that they would much rather be sitting behind the couch, their round, surprised eyes peeking over the top.
"Well, Galaxia's body was never meant to be a vessel for such a evil, powerful source of energy, like Chaos. But in Senshi Chaos form, that's my job: to track down stray Chaos energy, absorb it and transmute it into good energy. I have to be powerful to withstand the evil and power of loose Chaos energy."
Anarchy: "Oh what's the fun in that?"
Mayhem: "This is gonna really wreak havoc when our fanfic finally shifts from Super S into Sailorstars."
Havoc: "I wreak myself, thank you very much! Only Hentenno-sama can wreak true Havoc!! Check it out: thanks to the remote control of the gods I managed to boost all the Iczelion babes' panties while they were still inside their suits! Panties panties panties! Glorious silken Iczel treasures!!"
Carnage: [eyebrow twitch!] "Let me Dragu Slave him, Mayhem, please let me Dragu Slave him!"
"Masaka! That would mean that your more powerful than Galaxia!" Mayhem looked troubled by this.
Anarchy: [filing nails] "I wish I could say I was impressed with that...but I'm really not."
"Yep! But don't worry. I'm not after your starseeds or anything."
Mayhem: "Do we even have star seeds?"
Carnage: "I can try to rip one out of Chaos if you like."
Hotaru: [VERY protective of her Chaos-chan!] "Akito...!"
Anarchy did not seemed worried at all. "Good. If your so powerful, maybe you can keep these three out of trouble!"
Pesti: "Oh, and like the author's managed to do *that*. This entire series has been running out of control since F1!'s first paragraph."
Carnage: "Damn my Tenchi Masaki syndrome!"
Senshi Chaos laughed. "Hey. I'm not a god! Don't expect miracles!"
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