*          *          *

          With the Omake Theatre done, Chaos slowly turned back to the rest of the fanboys, an embarrassed grin on his face. "Then again, I could be wrong!"

          [Cue the facevaults!]

          "Oh, sugoi," Dark Mayhem muttered. "Thanks, Deso. You've just turned the fic into a Dadaist play."
          "Gomen nasai," Desolation sniffled.
          "Great, now this fic makes about as much sense as the ending to Movie Gear Solid 2," Demolition groaned.
          Pesti-chan scratched his head. "Um...don't you mean Metal Gear Solid 2, Demo?"
          "You obviously weren't around when we finished the game," Carnage said. He shook his head in disgust. "The ending movie begins. We sit there and watch it. Five minutes later, we go grab some drinks. The movie's still going on. Ten minutes later we order Dim Sum. The Dim Sum arrives a half hour later...and the movie's still going!! Could there be anything more ill-conceived?"
          Dark Mayhem thumbed over at Chaos. "What about his proposal for that new TV series: Violence Jackass?"
          "Actually," Chaos said. "What worries me more is that the network execs loved the idea and bought the rights to it. Apparently I'm making a killing in the ratings."
          Riot shook his head as he strolled up to the front door and opened it. Waiting on the other side was Goku sitting on the toilet and reading a newspaper.

Goku: [annoyed] "Do you mind?"

Riot: ^^;;;;; "I've been scared shitless too much lately."

          Closing the door behind him, Riot glanced back at the other fanboys. "Somehow I have a most dishonourably bad feeling about this."
          He then tried opening the front door again. This time he found himself staring at two unusually perky teenagers standing in a green field filled with deranged buildings, butterflies and giant dancing trees.

Seiichi: ^^v: "Ohayo! I'm Tachibara Seiichi, from the popular high school Kamichita High, 2nd class, 12th seat!"

Momo-chan: ^^v "We'd join you for the rest of your fic, but since he likes us now he won't take us out. Gomen!"

          Riot immediately slammed the door shut.
          "Wow, you just opened a door into Guu's stomach," Chaos said.
          Pesti-chan smacked Chaos upside the back of the head. "That isn't a good thing, Chaos! Mako-chan and I were going to meet here before going out on an afternoon date. How is she supposed to find the apartment if we're shifting all over the Aniverse?"
          "Why don't you try contacting her?" Demolition suggested. "I mean, if she's not at home to answer her phone, I'm sure Mayhem can hack into that little Senshi pager of hers for you."
          "No problem," Dark Mayhem said, sitting down in front of the computer. "I've hacked the Real before, I can hack some wristwatch communicators anytime."
          Meanwhile, Havoc wandered over to one of the cupboard doors in the kitchen and opened it up. A giant pile of panties came tumbling down, burying him. "Hotcha!" came Havoc's muffled cheer from beneath the pile of underwear. "Now this is my kinda crystal!"
          The next ten minutes were spent in complete and utter disarray, as the fanboys tried desperately to figure out where things were. Chaos tried using the little avatar's room, and wound up walking straight into Alucard's line of fire as the vampire was busy dispatching of some ghouls. But luckily for Chaos, since he had a compact brain (reduced to 40% its usual size) like Duramuramu, the bullet went straight in one ear and out the other without any damage whatsoever.
          Riot tried to get some fresh air out on the balcony, but when he slid open what was left of the window, he found himself gazing into Galaxia's throne room. And Galaxia wasn't thrilled at the sudden disruption to her game of checkers against Beryl.
          Still trying to raise Makoto on the phone, Pesti-chan glanced back at the dining room table...and promptly sweatdropped upon seeing Ruckus sitting at one of the dining room chairs with Ken from team Weib on his lap.
          "Wouldn't you know it?" Ruckus said with a grin. "The oven opens right up into the Koneko no Sumu flower shop!"
          Pesti-chan shuddered and went back to redialling Makoto's number again.
          Carnage, hoping to get a spare beam sabre to clean out his fingernails, opened up the broom closet leading into his room, and discovered that instead there was an army of Leo mecha units drifting in space, their weapons trained right at him.
          Carnage glanced over at Riot. "This will only take a minute," he said, drawing a twin satellite cannon. He paused, then traded the twin satellite cannon in for a Buster Beam cannon. "Make that twelve seconds, unless there's a few stray survivors."
          Oblivious to the sudden explosions lighting up the front entry of the apartment, Desolation and Demolition had lifted up the one end of Pesti-chan's blood-soaked rug and were gazing at a gaping inter-dimensional portal where the floor beneath the rug should have been. Sitting happily in the air, Xellos took a sip of tea and waved at them.
          Bewildered, Demolition and Desolation waved back.

Desolation: "Ano...what are you doing underneath the rug?"

Xellos: ^^v "Sore wa...himitsu desu!"

Demolition: -.-;; "Doesn't he ever get tired of saying that line?"

Xellos: ^^v "Sore wa--"

Demolition: [irate, oversized head mode!] "Will you cut that out?!"

          And true to form, Havoc was having a wonderful time in the kitchen as he opened up cupboard door after cupboard door, heaps of women's panties tumbling out and burying him in their laces and silk. Very soon the pile was up to the ceiling, with still more undies tumbling down the pile as the pile crept into the hallway and dining room.
          "Ne," Havoc remarked, underwear dangling off his head. "Would you say I have a plethora of panties now, Pesti-chan?"
          Pesti-chan sweatdropped. "Since when did you start reading a thesaurus, Havoc?"
          "I wonder how many different words there are for 'perverted little freakbiscuit'," murmured Carnage.
          Just then Chaos emerged from Pesti-chan's bedroom door, failing to notice the Agumon that had latched onto his leg. No one really wanted to ask either. "You know, those silver bullets Alucard uses can really clean out your ears," Chaos said cheerfully.
          Chaos strolled into the dining room and found himself knee- deep in panties. "Ne, where'd the kitchen go?"
          Havoc's head popped out from the giant mound o' underwear. "Today's kitchen special features fanservice with a smile! Hotcha!"
          "Smile at this, you perverted freak," Carnage snapped. "SCATTER BLEED!!!"
          Several dozens of energy spheres erupted from Carnage's palms and swarmed towards Havoc. However, the spheres came to an abrupt halt, then did a 180 degree turn and swarmed towards Desolation. Demolition and Pesti-chan dove for cover behind the couches as Desolation was spatter-gored all over the walls and ceiling.

Desolation's upper torso: "Hmmm...that was a new spell to get hit with. My fingers are all kinda tingly now!"

Dark Mayhem: [pointing to a blood smear on the wall] "You mean those fingers?"

Carnage: ^^;;; "Um...sorry about that, Deso!"

          Dark Mayhem shook his head as Demolition and Chaos tried to help reassemble Desolation's various body parts. "Okay, 'Wu' perforating aside, how are we doing?"
          "I've tried calling Makoto about seven times already," Pesti-chan said, flopping down on one of the unsullied chairs. "She's not answering."
          "Maybe she's in most honourable transit then," Riot offered. "I always find it hard to make use of my phone-fu when I am most honourably leaping through the trees."
          Pesti-chan blinked a few times. "Um...yeah. Okay. But the thing is, I've also tried to call Usagi, Ami and Rei too. No one's answering their phones."
          Dark Mayhem scowled and swung his swivel chair back around to face the computer. He started calling up some new folders stored in their database. Demolition leaned over Dark Mayhem's shoulder "Any luck with those pager thingies?"
          "Nothing," Dark Mayhem replied, his fingers clicking away on the keyboard. "And that's what I don't like. We've got their line...but there's only static. Either all the Senshi have suddenly gone out of range--"
          "Doubtful," Carnage said. "Their communicators have the range of the satellite arrays on most of my mobile suits."
          Dark Mayhem nodded. "I know. The only other option is this: something else is interfering."
          "Someone doesn't want me to date Mako-chan today?!" Pesti- chan exclaimed. He glared up at the ceiling. "Damn you, His lordship Chaos, what have I done lately to deserve your wrath?!"
          "Most foreboding," Riot said. "I would advice a bout of anything-goes, martial arts search-fu."
          Ruckus immediately put up his hand. "I vote I search with Chaos-cutey! He might get lost!"
          "What?!" Chaos exclaimed. "Do I look like Desolation here, Ruckus?"
          Desolation could only shrug. "I'm impressed I've just been in the scene for as long as I have. Usually a smite like that Slayers spell would have blown me elsewhere." He grinned and flashed the fanboys a V-sign. "I guess this is my lucky fic!"
          Seconds later he was clobbered by the alien mecha unit, Rah- Xephon.
          "That's going to be a bitch of a hole in the ceiling to fix," Demolition remarked.
          "Hai hai," Dark Mayhem agreed. "Chaos can pay for it with his cash from selling the rights to Violence Jackass. In the meantime, it looks like we'll need to spread out and search for the Senshi as best we can."
          "And just how are we going to accomplish that while the Milly Stone's screwing up all our normal exit points?" Chaos asked.
          Desolation's muffled voice came from beneath Rah-Xephon's foot. "We may be able to locate one of the Senshi just by opening up any door in the apartment. The crystal creates randomly-chosen portals, after all."
          Riot shrugged helplessly. "It's better than nothing."
          "I vote for blowing something up," Carnage said. "Can we fit that somewhere into the search and rescue operation?"
          Dark Mayhem sighed. "I doubt we'd be able to stop you, Carnage. Okay, everyone pick a room and start opening doors at random. I'll stay here in the living room and see what we can find here in the database. Let's try to get back here in an hour or so."
          Pesti-chan headed for the bathroom, while Carnage ducked into what he hoped would be his room via the hall closet. Ruckus decided on Chaos' bedroom, while Chaos got "volunteered" to explore Hysteria's room, and Demolition checked out Dark Mayhem's room. Havoc, on the other hand, just ventured into the pan-dimensional pocket inside his DOJI BOY shirt, and vanished.
          Not about to tempt fate again with the front door, Riot took Sarcasm's bedroom door.
          And Chaos was more than happy to tempt fate and open the front door. Upon opening it up, Gaghiel's mouth came out and ate him, the door closing shut as he was gulped down.
          Dark Mayhem shook his head and headed towards the computer. Then he suddenly noticed how he wasn't the only fanboy left in the living room. Glancing over his shoulder, her asked Desolation, "What are you still doing here?"
          Sniffled Desolation, "I can't find my way out of here."
          One of Dark Mayhem's eyebrows twitched. "Then let me help you."
          That said, he booted Desolation through the front door. Seconds later, Desolation came toppling out from inside the fridge. "That wasn't very nice!" Desolation grumped, rubbing his backside.
          "Didn't I just punt you elsewhere?" Dark Mayhem said, scratching his head in confusion.

*          *          *

          Up on the bridge, things were going from bad to worse as each new failure was being sent Hargen's way over the headsets. "We're getting reports from all over the ship!" a White Delmo shouted over the noise. "Delmo girls are being stripped of their uniforms by an unknown pervert!"
          "Two more intruders have evaded capture," another White Delmo reported. "And a third of the crew seems to have defected; they're following some guy named Carnage."
          "Blue Delmo squad Sixteen is under attack by flying cows and cross-dressing midgets," said yet another White Delmo said. "And there's scattered reports of a samurai advancing towards the bridge."
          Hargen's eyebrow twitched.
          For the past ten minutes, it was nothing but one failure after another. His Delmo's were being stripped and smited at every turn, even some the new recruits who had supernatural powers. It was one thing to be made a fool of by a voluptuous, butt-kicking babe like Aika...but to be made a fool by a bunch of notorious idiots?! It was more than his freakish little ego could bear.
          Hargen leaned back in his char, his brows furrowed in thought. After a moment of deep, almost hesitant consideration, he gave the command: "Unleash Weapon: Kawaii."
          The White Delmo's on the bridge all froze, an audible gasp heard from each of them. He might as well have told them that for great justice, they should take off every zig.
          "H-Hargen-sama?" one of the White Delmo girls asked quietly.
          Hargen shot her an annoyed glare. "Do it. Now. Let's see how those avatars survive one of the deadliest creations fandom has ever seen...."

Desolation: [dramatic pose!] "Move zig!!!"

Hargen: [scowl!] "What are you doing on my bridge again?"

Desolation: ^^;;; "Ano...."

Hargen: "SECURITY!!!"

Desolation: "Um...g'bye!"

          [Exit Desolation, stage anywhere!]

*          *          *

Thanks to:

Servo, Sean Gaffney & Greenbeans for helping sort through the fic and make sure the "linear" version of it made no sense whatsoever before we *really* decided to go and screw it up on everyone else. ^^v

Ferdama, for giving us the heads-up on that rather humorous "6 & 9" Gundam Wing anecdote. He pimps fansubs for us, he gives us material for our fics; is there anything he can't do?

Definite kudos goes out to Steve Shortino, for the "Hentai Clow Card" gag. Kinda makes me wonder that if Chaos were a Clow card, would he be "The Baka"?

"Domo!" to Greenbeans for her impressive grasp of ChuChu Rocket. Those of you wonder what ChuChu Rocket is, the guys at the online comic strip, Penny Arcade, have this to say: www.penny-arcade.com/view.php3?date=2000-02-16

Thanks to Deso for the "Jungle de Iku" Chaosfic...though for some reason I think I used this fic idea of his a while back. Oh well, I'm the almighty author, so anyone who wishes to prove my infallibility shall just have to go through my team of crack ninja Puchuu bears first!!!

Desolation the Black Knight is obviously a tribute to Monty Python's Search For The Holy Grail. Those of you who don't know what I'm talking about need to go rent the video or DVD, and learn how to properly use your coconuts.

And in closing, I laugh at Greenbeans and Nightbreak's ransom notes! They shall never break me down! In fact, I need more kawaii female assistants! My rampant ego always requires more worshipping sacrifices offered up to it.

Author's Rampant Ego: "FEED ME!!"

Desolation: --;; [tied up to an alter] "Just how does someone mistake me for a nubile, virgin Anime babe?!"

Fairy Godbabbit: "Well, your thighs are rather firm and supple."

Desolation: ^-^ "You think so? I get a lot of running from those falling colonies these days."

Oh, and I apologise in advance for the "Under the Yum-Yum Tree". Trust me, you'll know it when you stumble across it.

*          *          *

          Somewhere over the skies of Tokyo, high above the towering skyscrapers and the soon-to-be-doomed-yet-again Tokyo Tower, Havoc's mighty zeppelin, the Hindenboob, floating towards the Tokyo Bay.
          "You know," Demolition remarked as he loitered about the bridge with the rest of the fanboys. "It's somewhat surreal to know I'm in a Leiji Matsumoto airship repainted to look like a giant bosom."
          Working the giant wheel of the Hindenboob, Dark Mayhem slightly altered their course. "Hai hai, but this thing handles like a wet dream."
          "Think this'll actually work?" Ruckus remarked as he stared out the bridge windows...and Havoc, who resembled a suction cup plushie on the windshield of a car as he stared intently out at the city skyline.
          "Well, if anyone can track down an Anime babe in this series, it's Havoc," Pesti-chan said.
          Riot sighed and adjusted the katana sheathed in his belt. "Amazing to think his pervertedness comes in handy for once."
          "Please don't remind me," Carnage groaned. "I'm already loathed to know I had to depend on him."
          From where he sat on the floor, Chaos shrugged and said, "Well if you'd bothered to properly work out Escafanboy's design schematics...."
          He was instantly zorched.
          And so was Desolation for that matter.
          "Dammit, Carnage!" Pesti-chan snapped as he fetched the fire extinguisher and spritzed the two avatars. "Stop trying to detonate the zepplin! Do the words 'painful as hell explosion' mean anything to you?"
          Desolation shrugged. "Just means another Tuesday afternoon appointment for me."
          "Shouldn't you be getting smited in a completely different Anime series already?" Pesti-chan asked.
          "I seem to be getting my quota of ass-kickings well enough in this series, thank you very much," Desolation sighed.
          "I'm just glad to get out of that inter-dimensional labyrinth we used to call our apartment," Dark Mayhem said, turning the wheel ever so slightly to starboard. "Let's just hope we can track that Milly Stone down again before it screws up the rest of our series. I don't think otaku will take too well to a non-linear MSTfic."
          Suddenly Havoc leapt onto the Hindenboob's wheel, staring off to the westward horizon. "Yuri sense...tingling!" he exclaimed.
          With a deadpan expression, Dark Mayhem glanced at Havoc's pants. "Ne, Havoc, your sensory organ's leaking."

Chaos: >.< "Too much information!!!"

          The Hindenboob veered towards the west, dipping down low between a few office buildings so as to avoid any sort of detection. Granted they weren't exactly subtle as they scraped between the buildings and waved to all the stunned salarymen in the windows.
          "Someone really has been having a go at the Anime babe population," Demolition said. "All these offices and not an office lady in sight."
          "We're getting closer," Havoc said, straining against the glass. "I can sense the panties calling out to me!"
          Chaos put a restraining hand on Havoc's shoulder. "Down, Havoc, or no cookies for you."
          "Are we ensuring that we will not be spotted?" Riot asked Dark Mayhem.
          Dark Mayhem nodded as he pressed a few buttons on a nearby console, plotting a course for the automated piloting system. "Naturally. Okay, guys, our kidnapper's transport should be coming into view once we sneak around that next building."
          The Hindenboob rounded one more office tower, and a silhouette in the skies came into view. All of the fanboys crowded the windows to get a better look.
          "Oooh, he had better not be trying anything funny with my Mako-chan," Pesti-chan growled, punching his hand into his fist. "Otherwise he'll feel my mass destructive wrath!"
          "What are you going to do?" retorted Chaos. "Go SD and kick him in the ankles repeatedly?"
          Pesti-chan wasted no time in Rumblequaking Chaos.
          And Desolation too.
          "Gomen nasai!" Pesti-chan said as he helped Desolation's smoky, mangled body off the floor. "I forgot about you being a smite magnet yourself."
          "That's all right, I'm used to the whole incineration thing," Desolation replied, dusting some ash out of his hair.
          Carnage was busy studying the silhouette of the ship in the skies. "Definitely geared for interstellar transport," he said. "Judging by the make of it, while it's not made for travel outside the solar system, it can definitely go in and out of Earth's orbit with relative ease."
          "Ne, doesn't that ship look oddly familiar to anyone else?" Demolition remarked, staring out the window.
          Riot stepped up to the glass and squinted at the growing speck. "Ah! The Holy Fox, flagship of Captain Hargen from the AIKa OVA series. Hmmm...and it appears that one girl on the fourth floor doesn't mind changing with her porthole window uncovered. Aaah, a pink lacy bra. Most honourable!"

Demolition: [sweatdrop!] "How can you see all that without even opening your eyes, man?!"

Havoc: [staring out at the Holy Fox] "Hmm...I'd argue her bra was more a chiffon than pink, Riot."

Riot: [most honourable squint-fu!] "Perhaps, though I believe that is a trick of the light in her most honourable domicile. It could be a rose tint too."

Demolition: -.-;; "That's it, I'm leaving!"

          "That's Hargen's ship?" Dark Mayhem remarked. He rolled his eyes and stepped away from the windows. "Well, that suddenly explains a lot."
          Pesti-chan scratched his head. "Har-what?"
          "In the AIKa Anime," Dark Mayhem explained. "Hargen steals this substance called Ragh. Ragh acts as a catalyst for destroying the earth; its energy can split the earth open, causing hundreds of volcanic eruptions, annihilating everything on the planet. However, Ragh also has a special wave motion which can change matter at a subatomic level. It can clean up pollution and restore the Earth...but at the cost of eradicating human civilisation."
          "And if someone deliberately triggers the Ragh to go off," Demolition continued grimly. "They'll rule over the new world."
          Havoc beamed. "Hotcha! Hentopia!"

          [Cue the facevaults!]

          "So this Ragh is a weapon whose purpose is the destruction of everything in existence?" Pesti-chan said. "What kind of a psycho would build a thing like that?!"
          Everyone paused and looked back at Carnage.
          "Hey, I'm still in the drafting process," Carnage stated emphatically. "Give me a week, a telephone booth, an N-2 mine and three cans of cheese spray, and I can one-up this Ragh stuff."
          "Present company excluded, of course," Dark Mayhem added. "We should try to sneak in as close as possible beneath their radar. If Hargen's managed to turn all of the Delmo girls against us, there's going to be veritable armies of babes wanting to kill us."
          Carnage blinked a few times, and stopped polishing his Zanza sword. "And?"
          "We want to subdue them, not deatomize them, Carnage," Pesti- chan said. "Besides, we don't even know where they might be holding my Mako-chan prisoner."
          "Given the number of Anime babes gone missing, that would have to be one big-assed holding area," Chaos added.
          Dark Mayhem nodded. "Let's slow this rig down a bit, Havoc. I think we might be dangerously close to being noticed."
          The Hindenboob, however, didn't slow down. If it did anything, it began to pick up speed.
          "Havoc?" Demolition called out, glancing back at the wheel. "Havoc!"
          With a crazed grin on his face, Havoc stared at the Holy Fox and increased the engine speed. "Panties!" he proclaimed. "Panties for Havoc!!"

Desolation: o.O;; "We're on a collision course with Hargen's ship!"

Demolition: "Somehow I think they're going to notice that."

Chaos: [scratching his head] "And that's a bad thing, isn't it?"

Carnage: "You think, Chaos?!"

Chaos: ^^;;; "I try not to. Too much effort."

Dark Mayhem: "And it shows, Chaos. It really shows."

Ruckus: [sigh!] "You see, this is why you should let the ninja drive. Ninjas know how to sneak up on people."

Pesti: -.-;; "Don't remind me."

Ruckus: "Oh, are you still sore about me crawling into bed with you this morning?"

Pesti: [irate avatar mode!] "Gee, let me think...HELL YES!!!"

*          *          *

          "Time to see how Weapon: Kawaii is faring," Hargen remarked, smug in the knowledge that by now the fanboy intruders must be subdued by his elite weapon. "Patch me through to her."
          One of the White Delmo's nodded. "Hai!"
          The viewscreen flickered to life, displaying a room that was nothing short of a Hello Kitty night terror. Sanrio wall scrolls and throw pillows were everywhere. The wallpaper was an amazing Dragon Pink colour, with all sorts of bishie boyband posters tacked all over. The floor was a sea of plushies, and wading through it were no less than 40 Anime babes...all dressed in kawaii frilly aprons and loathing it.
          Hysteria's face suddenly popped up on the screen.
          "Ohayo gozaimasu!" she chimed. "Golden Delmo-chan Hysteria reporting!"
          Hargen slowly looked from one side of the viewscreen to the next, noting the myriad of tables and tea sets. Not to mention the leg shackles chaining all of *his* prisoners to the tables. "Hysteria, just what exactly are you doing?" Hargen asked.
          Hysteria beamed as she poured Ryoko another cup of Hotcha Ocha tea. "Why, Hysteria's having a kawaii little tea party-chan with the kawaii little prisoner-chans, of course!"
          "What about your mission?" Hargen said. "You were supposed to go after the intruders on the ship. You know, the males. What happened to attacking the male intruders?"
          For a brief instant, Hysteria had the expression of a Shinma caught in the headlights. Then she burst out in a fit of nervous giggles. "Gomen nasai! Hysteria completely forgot about that!"
          Hargen groaned in exasperation and cradled his head in his hands. "What use is a weapon like her if she turns on your own luscious troops?" he muttered.
          The viewscreen was turned off.
          In the end, it was decided that the ship was better off with Hysteria terrorizing the captive Anime babes rather than the rest of crew. Besides, Hargen reflected, ten minutes with her would make becoming a Delmo girl a much more pleasant alternative.
          Hargen turned his head as he noted some Blue Delmo officers step onto the bridge, one of his prisoners accompanying them. "Can I help you?" he inquired as Hotaru was brought before him. He smirked as he noted that his chair gave him the perfect view of Hotaru's blue panties.
          "She wishes to join the Delmo's of her own free will," one of the Blue Delmo girls stated. "She asked that she be brought to you personally, to show you her dedication."
          Hargen scratched his chin. "She does, ne? You'll have to forgive my scepticism, but this sounds like a near-perfect ploy to lower my guard long enough for you to get an attack in. You are, after all, an Outer Senshi, my dear."
          A kuroneko-like grin appeared on Hotaru's face, and she squatted down in front of Hargen, now giving him a perfect crotch shot of her panties. "But of course I am," she purred, leaning forward and letting him see down the top of her shirt. "And it's the excitement of having a spitfire like me that makes you want me all the more. Ne?"
          Hargen licked his lips as his gaze became fixated on Hotaru's crotch. "You're intriguing me. Go on."
          Hotaru slid one of her fingers into her mouth and sucked on it for a moment before slowly, teasingly drawing back out. "I want you, Hargen-sama," she whispered in a throat, lusty voice. She began to comb her fingers through the long strands of Hargen's hair. "Fill me, and I will fulfill your every dream."
          Hargen grinned at her advances.
          Desolation, on the other hand, made a gagging noise, followed by mouthing 'loser' to Hargen.
          Casting a sidelong glance over at Desolation, who had once again managed to infiltrate the bridge by sheer accident, Hargen thumbed over to the fanboy and said to Hotaru, "I'll make you scream my name, after you first prove your loyalty to me. Kill him."

Desolation: o.O;;

          A wicked smile grew on Hotaru's face as she rose up and started stalking her way towards Desolation. In seeing how serious she was, Desolation sweatdropped. "Um...Hotaru, what's with the indecent proposal to Captain Lipstick over there? You're not serious about wanting to share a lemonfic with him, are you? What about your love for Chaos? For as much of a baka as he is, he's certainly the lesser of two evils here!"
          That didn't stop Hotaru.
          In fact, the thought of spurning Chaos seemed to turn her on even more.
          Desolation gulped and pulled out a pomegranate. "I'm warning you, Hotaru," he said nervously. "I've got a pomegranate of doom, and I'm not afraid to use it!"
          Hotaru stood face to face with Desolation and hooked her arms around the back of his neck. She leaned in closely to Desolation's ear. "Make it look good," Hotaru muttered
          Desolation gawked at her.
          She immediately jammed her knee into his groin.
          Really hard.
          Then began to grind her knee in even further.
          Desolation's eyes went crossed as his face turned many different colours not usually found in nature. His eyes subsequently uncrossed when Hotaru pulled out Rampage, and stuffed Desolation down Rampage's mouth.


Hotaru: "Hmm...you've still got a leg sticking out of your mouth, Rampage-chan. Here, let me get a plunger and help you get it all down."

Desolation: [muffled voice inside Rampage's stomach!] "Hey, look! My 'Wu' mark glows in the dark!"

          "Ara ara," Hargen said, rising from his captain's chair. "You've done better than I would have expected. And letting a fanboy like that suffer the agony of being digested in a kawaii obligatory mascot's stomach certainly shows your devotion. I'm impressed, Hotaru-chan. I really am."
          He gestured for her to follow him as he strolled out from the bridge, two Blue Delmo girls accompanying them.
          "In fact," Hargen continued. "I'll let you experience things you've never even imagined."
          He placed his hand on her butt and copped a feel.
          Hotaru purred and snuggled up against his chest. "Hai, Hargen-sama...."

Page 6
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