SOMEONE'S TAKEN THEIR LOVE OF ANIME ONE STEP TOO FAR...
FAMINE'S SLASHERFIC 2!!!

        [Fanboy's Note: when last we left our fanficfic, Famine was single-handedly wiping out our entire cast of fanboys one paragraph at a time! Now with only Chaos left to feel the blunt-edged wrath of the crazed killer who knows what they did last fanfic, he finds himself suddenly alone reading this slasherfic as someone starts to pound on the front doors to apartment....Cue the spooky opening theme music!]

        Chaos: "Okay Chaos, it must all be your imagination. This is all from Anarchy making you watch that Himechan No Ribon marathon. It has to be a dream!"
        Door: "THUD THUD THUD!!!!"
        [Chaos pulls out a pair of red ruby slippers!]
        Chaos; [clicking his heels!] "There's no place like College Life! There's no place like College Life!"
        [Cue the terrified, flying octopus that glues itself to the back of Chaos' head!]
        Chaos: "DO YOU MIND, BEANS?! I'VE GOT ENOUGH TROUBLES ALREADY WITHOUT YOU GIVING ME A BAD HAIR FIC!!"
        [The doors rattle furiously!]
        Chaos: [panicky SD form!] "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"
        Carnage: "BLAST ASH!!"
        [The door explodes, smiting Chaos!]
        Chaos: "I-I-I-Itaaaaaiiii!!! Na ni? Carnage?"
        Carnage: "Dammit, it took me the entire first part of that last fanficfic to find my way into this fanficfic."
        Chaos: "What the hell are you doing here?"
        Carnage: [growl!] "I'd like to ask our author that same question. There I was, happily polishing the chest plate of my beloved RX-78GP02A Gundam Physalis and suddenly I wind up here!"
        Chaos: "Oh, that. Contractual obligation, Carnage; now that you're a reoccurring fanboy you've got to appear for the fanficfics. You might as well get used to it."
        Carnage: [sulking] "If the author so much as wipes off the shine on my Physalis, he'll pay dearly for it."

>NOW, BACK TO THE STORY
        >
        >We last left our Fanboys dead, yes dead. Havoc, Mayhem and Pesti-chan have been killed by The Crazed Killer Who Knows What You Did Last Fanfic. Now it is Chaos' turn. Enjoy.

        Chaos: "I AM NOT ENJOYING THIS, FAMINE!!!"
        Carnage: "Popcorn?"
        Chaos: "Give me thaaaaaaa!!...What? No butter?"

        > Everything came into focus and the focus was on The Crazed Killer Who Knows What You Did Last Fanfic who lifted the right arm with the mallet. The mallet paused in the air to add suspense and Chaos' whole life flashed before his eyes. All his memories good and bad. The main memories that caught his attention were the memories of him and his fellow Fanboys in Tokyo.

        Chaos: [reliving the memories!] "Oooh! That was nice..and-No! Look out Chaos! It's Haruka and she's got her Space Sword! Run away! No, not that way! Faster, damn you! No, faster, damn me? No! What am I saying?! Waaah!!"
        Carnage: [eye roll!] "That's what I'd like to know. [sigh!] Idiot."

        >Being with the Senshi and just having a great time. But now this Crazed Killer has ruined the future memories to come. That Killer killed the perverted Havoc, the intelligent Mayhem and the innocent Pesti-chan. (from time to time a Fanboy can be innocent) This made Chaos pissed.

        Carnage: [with Zanba sword] "I'm praying here that the pissed he's talking about has nothing to do with your pants."
        Chaos: [groan!] "He already did that to me in the first part."

        > The mallet came down and would have hit Chaos full in the head but the mallet was stopped by an umbrella. Yes, Chaos pulled out an umbrella and stopped the mallet. Chaos moved and manoeuvred the mallet to the side and got up. The Crazed Killer was caught off guard by this and took a step back. Chaos shifted the umbrella from his right hand to his left and then he summoned the smiting of a cow. It almost hit the Killer but the Killer snapped his fingers and a parachute appeared on the cow and it floated nicely to the ground in-between Chaos and the Killer.

        Chaos: "Good lord! The crazed killer was the one who sent me that eyecatch! Suddenly it all makes diabolical sense!"
        Carnage: [motioning to Famine, the author] "Yes, cheque please, paragraph 4. And make it snappy!"

        >The Killer took the mallet and smacked the cow out of the house and into the closest McDonalds. McDonalds kept all the useless parts of the cow to make their burgers and threw the good stuff to the vultures.
       

        [Chaos and Carnage slowly stop chewing their McDonalds burgers, eyeing them suspiciously]

        >But back to the house.
        >Chaos: You killed Havoc and Mayhem and Pesti-chan. Now I'm going to kick your trench coated ass straight into another dimension.
       

        Chaos: "Yeah! You tell him, Chaos! No, I tell him, Chaos! No we tell him, Chaos! What the hell am I saying?!"
        Carnage: [with Zanba sword] "Don't give me an excuse to hurt you, Chaos."
        Chaos: [sweatdrop!] "That never stopped you before, Carnage."
        Carnage: [evil grin!] "Saaay...that's right! GAAV FLARE!!!"
        [An SD Chaos frantically races across the slasherfic as the nasty electric fireball gives chase!]
        Chaos: "KYAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

        > With an umbrella in his left hand, Chaos pulled out a herring for his right hand and dually armed he attacked the Killer. The Killer was still stunned by this. In trying to make Chaos go out of his mind the Killer actually put Chaos in a right mind set.
       

        Carnage: "Now that is truly frightening."
        Chaos: [eyebrow twitch!] "......"

        >One of doing good and avenging his friends deaths. The Crazed Killer saw Chaos coming at him with two weapons and pulled out a lawn flamingo for his left hand. So with mallet in right and flamingo in left, the Killer met the attack. The two figures were locked in chivalrous battle.
       

        Chaos: "Quick, Carnage, you distract him and I'll tie his shoelaces together!"
        Carnage: [sigh!] "Baka baka."

        >Each using hand weapons and countering and fighting each other. For a long time it seemed that nobody would win. The two knights were both using the Smite as Darth Vader and Obi Wan used the Force in their battle.
       

        Carnage: "You know, if I had been featured in this slasherfic, I'd have just annihilated this guy's mallet-toting ass with Gundamn Wing Endless Waltz's Tallgeese III mecha."
        Chaos: "Carnage, if you had been featured in this slasherfic, it would have ended after the first paragraph thanks to you Giga Slaving it!!"
        Carnage: "Yes, your point being?"
        Chaos: o.O

        >Chaos: You use the smite well. But you use it for evil. That pan dimensional Anime mallet used to kill people has evil written all over it. It matches your trench coat and hat. But explain that stupid pink lawn flamingo. It doesn't match at all.
       

        [Chaos doffs a kawaii pink frilly skirt and blouse ensemble!]
        Chaos: "Now *this* on the other hand matches perfectly!"
        Carnage: o.O "What...the...hell...?!"

        > Finally it clicked in Chaos' head who the killer was. The two figures then locked their weapons together and went face to face.
        >Chaos: You'll never win..... Famine.
       

        Chaos: o.O "FAMINE?!?! UNDERLORD IN TRAINING, TRAINING FAMINE?!?!"
        Carnage: "Oh, so you do know him after all. Well that explains this slasherfic."
        Chaos: "Hush, Dragu Slave-happy boy!"
        Carnage: [pokes Chaos' nose with the Zanba blade] "Don't tempt me, Little Miss Dragqueen."
        Chaos: "I AM NOT A DRAGQUEEN!!!"
        Carnage: [eyebrow raised in dark curiosity] "Then please do explain what you're doing with that skirt on."
        Chaos: "Well, I have to coordinate with my blouse and high heels, don't I?"
        [Carnage facevaults!]

        >The Crazed Killer: Bwah ha, wah ha, ah ha, ha!!!!
       

        Carnage: "You know, I have friends who can see to it that he's never heard from again."
        Chaos: "Carnage, you *are* the friends who can see too it that he's never heard from again!!"
        Carnage: [playing with an SD Deathscythe Hell Custom mecha keychain!] "Aren't I, though?"

        > The blackness dissolved from the face of the killer to reveal the familiar face of Famine.
        >Famine: Ola Chaos. How's your weekend?
       

        Chaos: [sulking] "Oh, just peachy...no thanks to you!!"

        >(cue the gratifying self-insertion here)
        >
        >Chaos: Famine, why?
        > The two combatants pulled apart from each other.
        >Famine: What? Why did I kill Havoc, Mayhem and Pesti-chan?
        >Chaos: No, I meant why did you buy a mansion like this in the middle of nowhere. It's a hideous location. You baka, of course why did you kill them?!
       

        Carnage: [singing] "We're not gonna take it! No, we ain't gonna take it! We're not gonna take this fic anymore! MEGA BRAND!!!"
        [Cue the devastating Mega Brand explosion!!]
        Chaos: [flying through the ceiling!] "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!"

Page 2

Back to Fanfics